Currently, I am in a long-distance relationship, and as in any relationship it has its struggles and upsides. Many will ask how I survive, and I believe they are asking the wrong question. If you’re merely surviving your relationships, I would encourage you to evaluate them. My belief is that in any relationship – friendly or intimate you should thrive not merely survive. This philosophy encourages the question “how do you thrive?” as opposed to “how do you survive?” So how do we as individuals that have decided to commit time and energy to each other thrive, both together and apart?
Long-distance relationships have a bad reputation, and some even don’t believe they can work. Yes, they can be a lot of hard work and do take incredibly hard work and dedication. However, I believe there are at least as many positive sides as bad sides, if not more, in this type of relationship.
When living in different places you truly learn to appreciate the time you spend together and tend to strive after new experiences to try together. Furthermore you often individually seek out new activities and hobbies, this often as a way to distract yourself from missing your partner. Seeking new experiences will not only grow you as a person but in many cases strengthen your relationship. We as a society often dream of a person ‘completing’ us, instead of someone who motivates us to complete ourselves. This is what long-distance relationships, excel at – completing ourselves while encouraging the other to seek out positive actions.
To have a successful relationship trust and communication is key, but that becomes even more prominent if that relationship is long-distance. Many relationships often are often marked by jealousy and a need for control. This type of dynamic, while often not noticed, is precedent in our society. Often times while scrolling social media I will see what aims to be relatable posts and pictures bordering on idolizing jealousy and controlling behavior. Not only is this unhealthy, but a relationship built on insecurity will not last. When going long-distance you are forced to work on trust and your communication, and this will undeniably help the relationship long term.
Being your own person first, and denying the notion that you need a person to complete you will only do good for your relationship. So, whether you’re in a long-distance relationship looking for comfort in what is a difficult journey to be on, or in a relationship where you are able to see your partner every day, remember that a relationship should be a place where you both grow together and individually without becoming co-dependent. So, seek ways to grow and develop as an individual because that will be how you grow and nurture your relationship.