Earlier this year I and a group of others were asked to choose three words to describe ourselves, as I have a handy tagline I decided to use the same way to describe myself in this instance “a lazy, gay, feminist.” I was told that there was more to me than my sexuality as if I didn’t know it. I was told my sexuality didn’t have an impact on the way I live my life, as if she knew. And as I explained why I so heavily identify as gay, I was told I was wrong, as if she knew what being anything other than straight was like.
I choose to heavily identify with my sexuality because I’ve had to, and still have to fight for the right to exist. I heavily identify with my sexuality because of the process I went through to accept it. I heavily identify with my sexuality to say “I’m still here bitches” to those who have tried to oppress me. I heavily identify with my sexuality because my identity comes with a community of others who also didn’t have the privilege of not having to fight for their sexuality. I heavily identify with my sexuality to tell the kid who struggles with theirs that it is okay and that they will be okay.
That doesn’t mean that it is all I am, but it is the thing I have to fight to be allowed to be. Do not let anyone make you feel invalidated, your sexuality, your gender identity, your expression, and your story is completely yours, and it is no one else’s right to tell you how you should identify. Own yourself and the labels that give you comfort, in a world where you are a minority and do not let anyone tell you that you are wrong. And if they do, lift your head up high and walk right past them. You are uniquely you, and only you choose how you want to express that uniqueness.
